Accosted by Christians

So, this is a narrative, kind of, about something that actually happened to me, but I couldn’t just tell it. I think I might turn this into a short play, but I secretly hate having things be about me. I feel like it’s self centered...anyway, here goes... Upon entering a street in central Belfast I see 2 men with a small table with what appears to be books on it. My first thought is are they JW’s?, second thought are they Mormon’s?, third thought are they Christians? I had seen their counterparts before, 2 women, long skirts, same table, same books. I kept walking. I had things to do. My thoughts got the better of me...

“I should go back. If they’re Christians then we can high five. Wouldn’t that be the right thing to do? we are all for the same thing.”

I walk over, hearing an old man preaching to them, not sure about what, they handed him a track either way.

I introduced myself, told them about Redeemer and asked them who they were with. “Who are we with?”, I asked them. “Yeah, are you affiliated with a church or are you doing this lone wolf style?” Sometimes people don’t understand images I use to describe things. They were on their own. They handed me a track and a pamphlet. I explained again I was a Christian and handed the paphlet back. I handed him a Redeemer business type card and he handed it back.

“When there is an inward conversion the appearance on the outside should reflect that change. I used to party, do drugs, go see bands play…” I cut him off. “Are you judging me based on how I look?”. “Yes, well…” I cut him off. Sigh, this isn’t the first time I’ve been misjudged by someone who claims to be saved, and I’m sure he is…just a little narrow minded. I’ll give him a point for being honest though…and of course this was the day I chose to wear red lipstick and leopard print tights with my black shorts. That being said, I was still modest.

“So when was your conversion?” he asked.  “Uh, I was saved when I was 8…” I started. “But when was your conversion?” he asked again.  “I’m not sure I understand what you’re asking me.” I could feel the panic and hurt rising up from the pit of my stomach. I had an idea of what he was trying to say…“When you’ve had a conversion you shouldn’t mark yourself and…” I cut him off. “Are you serious? I’ve had enough.” I said this one hand up in protest, while shoving the track into my pocket. Tears in my eyes I walked away.

“It’s Christians like that…don’t throw the OT in my face…’ I said, shaking my head. “I have Jesus tattooed on my arm.”

THE END (i guess…i’ll work on it)

Hindsight will cause you to agonize over all the things you could have said. I could have retorted with verses about grace and love, how God is the only one fit to judge me, how that verse in the Old Testament only applies to Jews, and it’s about people in mourning AND that because Jesus died for us we don’t live under the condemnation of the Law. Oh AND there’s a verse in Revelation about Jesus having something written on His leg, so don’t be giving me a hard time about my tattoos. I didn’t say anything of those things. I just cried. I’m a kitten of a girl, don’t be fooled by my exterior. I was just so caught off guard and just so hurt by their judgement.

A few days later when I was able to think about this properly I figured out I was mostly upset because he assumed things about me. He assumed the worst about me. My character, the thing that God is working on everyday in every situation was called into question because I have piercings and tattoos.

I find my identity in Christ and He, I think, works that out through the refining of our character. It’s caused me grief and taken years to finally embrace and revel in who Christ made me. Character, flaws, appearance and all. I don’t care that there were assumptions made about me, I care what the assumptions were. It’s funny ‘cos that’s the same reason why I find it hard to admit that I’m a Christian. It leads people to assume lots of things about you. Why can’t we just stop assuming? Why can’t we just love people and then get to know them? I’m so relieved to be a part of the church body where loving people and building relationships with them, regardless of who they are (or what they look like), is something we believe in and do. I can finally be Leah, whatever that means. I don’t have to worry about judgment or feeling like I don’t fit in, ‘cos actually I totally fit in! I am loved and appreciated here. Thanks family.

Comments

Another great post -  we all cant wait for you to get back!

We love everything you represent.  Viva la Kaleidoscope

By David Capener. Posted on Wednesday 11th Nov 2009 at 10:34

I think that the greater our experience and understanding of the Father, the better our response to other people. The more we experience God’s unconditional acceptance, then the better able we are to unconditionally accept others. Maybe that guy who spoke to you that day hasn’t had the experience of God that you have – maybe he still sees people through his own small mindset, and not through God’s very wide lens. I guess what we should do in these situations is respond with the same unconditional love we have experienced from the Father – but that’s not always easy! Good for you Leah – this is a nice post. Did I mention I find you intriguing… ?!?!

By Emma Keenan. Posted on Thursday 12th Nov 2009 at 14:57

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